The need for family stories
"Deeply embedded in the soul of every family is a vision of what the world is like... and how best to survive it." - Author Elizabeth Stone |
As author Jack Maquire says, "We can draw on {our personal stories} privately for solace, centering, grounding, and decision making."
Family stories are important because they:
- build a sense of family heritage, personal identity and self esteem
- create family identity and purpose
- increase family communication
- help maintain strong families
- enable us to feel connected to our extended family
Ancestry.com
notes that family stories are critical for genealogical research, as they are often rich in details. Details that identify ancestors and define family history. After all -
"There are no ordinary people." - CS Lewis |
Be the Storyteller in your Family
Every individual and each family has a story – what’s yours?
To help identify your "story," take a moment to write down just two things that you would like others to know about you after you have passed away.
(Catch the vision of storytelling from author and storyteller,
Joe McHugh.)
Are you ready to capture your family story?
Begin by establishing what you want to accomplish. Create a theme or focus on a particular person. Don't try to capture someone's entire personal history at once though - it's too overwhelming. Instead, focus on small portions at a time such as annual traditions, holidays or a particular event. Develop a list of basic questions and then use your family reunion to interview, research and document.
For a completely unique experience and perspective, let (or help) a child conduct the interview. I recently took my 6-year-old son with me to visit with my husband's Great Grandmother. He asked questions I didn't think of and was able to elicit information I couldn't draw out!
When interviewing family members, consider recording the conversation so that you can focus on being a good listener during the visit.
To prepare specific questions and conversation topics in advance, look for books on "personal storytelling" or "life history" at your local library. These kinds of books are full of questions, conversation prompts and journaling guides specifically written for drawing out memories.
Some very basic personal history questions might include…
- Where did you go to school?
- What foods did you hate?
- How often did you see your cousins?
"Family stories should reflect change and life’s realities and be allowed to develop and grow organically to reflect a changing family. Stories are important - whether we tell them in our annual newsletters, in person or over the phone. Connecting to one another through our family lore is as important now as it has ever been." - Freelance writer Kori Rodley Irons of Eugene, Oregon |
A story can change with each oral telling, so don’t forget to
Write them down
Heritage Makers suggests using "story maps" to plan a storybook cover to cover, thus making it extremely easy to write and publish all of your stories. Story maps include interview questions, photo suggestions and even writing tips.
There are many online resources, classes and books that can teach you the skills necessary for documenting your personal and family histories. You could also consider hiring a professional.
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